Cooking kills…


I woke up at about 04:00 this morning, which sounds kinda early, but I ended up going to bed at 17:00 yesterday. I’m still trying to adjust to the new timezone. Anyway, when I woke up there was a vague smell of natural gas. I blew my nose and then I noticed it was actually a very strong smell of gas. I walked down stairs, remembering not to turn on any lights. When I got to the kitchen I found one of the rings on the cooker was turned on about 1/4 of the way. I turned it off and opened every door and window I could. A few minutes later I was able to turn on the lights.

I’m taking this as a sign that cooking is an extremely deadly persuit. If I hadn’t boiled that rice yesterday, I wouldn’t have knocked the other ring by accident and I wouldn’t have had a brush with death…

So next time you are watching Jamie Oliver, Gordon Ramsey or Nigella Lawson, I urge you to point a finger at the TV and scream, “Noooooo!”, then open a can of baked beans and eat them cold, safe in the knowledge that you will not wake up dead. 🙂



Author: Tim...

DBA, Developer, Author, Trainer.

11 thoughts on “Cooking kills…”

  1. When I get home tonight I need to find where mine is. I bought one when I had a leak in the summer (one week after moving in) and it all got shut off. But when it was fixed 6 weeks later I forgot all about it. It’s still sitting in a packet somewhere.

    So thanks for the reminder.

  2. Statistically speaking you’re more likely to cut your hand opening a can of baked beans than you are to get injured due to a gas leak.

    Of course 98% of all statistics are entirely made up on the spot…

  3. Oh man…it is really dangerous 🙁

    I vaguely remember an incident. It was 3-4 years back, i was making tea (Yea, that is how we make tea, here in India, in case of any confusions 😉 ) before leaving for office in the morning. In all the hurry, totally forgot about that and left for office. After reaching there (it was hardly a 15 min drive on bike) it hit my mind…”bullshit…i was making tea !!!”. So i rushed back and found that all the water/milk had turned black with lots of bubbles (they were black too 😀 ) and the stove was still burning (safer than a gas leakage, i think 😉 ).

  4. If you had a job, you could eat in the staff canteen and then never need to cook at home

  5. Debra: Alternatively, I may have rushed out of the house and left the gas on for another day, thereby increasing the chance of an explosion.

    Your argument is so flawed, it is obvious to me you have not considered the beefits of not working properly… 🙂



  6. Hi Tim,

    Nowadays, I travel and work so much that the cost savings of buying and cooking food is just not worth it from an economic and opportunity cost.



    We have a kitchen island with an electric stove, 4 burners and a grill. I’ve been unsuccessful at my attempts to train wife/kids not to leave flammable things like plastic grocery bags on the stove. There are only two little red lights for the 5 areas, you can’t tell by looking what is, or has been, on. I’m just amazed the cats haven’t gotten a hotfoot. People have been burned, but haven’t learned.

    I once did burn off all facial hair and got knocked unconscious trying to light the water heater. The house had been converted from one type of gas to another, right before I bought it, without changing the gas orifice or regulator.

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