Dodgy SQL and Dodgy Products


Dodgy SQL
Developer: What’s wrong with this SQL statement?
Me: I’ve done an SQL trace on it and it churns through 1.6 Gig of data, 0.3 Gig from disk taking 439 seconds, the rest coming from memory, but incuring a 140 second delay due to assorted cluster waits.
Conclusion: It’s a quality statement, not! 🙂

Dodgy Products
My hatred for Oracle Collaboration Suite (OCS) is growing by the day. It’s completely…

I’ve decided to take leaf out of David Aldridge’s book and create a list of my own:

Alternative meanings for the OCS acronym:

  • Overly Complicated Sh*t
  • Obtuse Craptastic System
  • It doesn’t work, it’s complete crap, just ditch it and write something decent that works and doesn’t need loads of harware to do a really simple job!

OK, the last one doesn’t quite work, but the sentiment is spot on! Please feel free to contribute your own ideas 🙂

By the way, did I mention that OCS is a steaming pile of…



PS. Oracle applications are a total mess as well.

PPS. The application servers are a nighmare. Hopefully Larry will get his head out of his ass and do something about them!

PPPS. Why are there so many bugs in the DB these days?

Author: Tim...

DBA, Developer, Author, Trainer.

16 thoughts on “Dodgy SQL and Dodgy Products”

  1. Hi Tim,

    Recently I gave a list of links for blogs on Oracle to be published in my company newsletter. The editors after reading your blog (specially the part on Oracle Application Server) decided not to include it and I got a frown for my comment :).


  2. adewri said…Recently I gave a list of links for blogs on Oracle to be published in my company newsletter. The editors after reading your blog (specially the part on Oracle Application Server) decided not to include it and I got a frown for my comment :).

    Give them DKB’s blog instead and how quickly they will take Tim’s blog over that one!!! 😀 😀

  3. OK, there’s a fair bit of venom today, but I find it really frustrating when products that cost loads of cash just don’t do what they say on the box.

    OCS is not fit for an enterprise environment.

    The App servers are a joke. Apache is a great product, and very stable when used with other kit like PHP or Tomcat, but when Oracle added all that other rubbish they made it memory and CPU hungry and killed any hope of reliability.

    Let’s hope the whole fusion thing is more than lip service. perhaps they might get all the middleware and application sorted at last…

    And I’m not the first to say that the database is getting very buggy these days. I tend to agree that Oracle seem too distracted by adding more features, rather than making the basics work.

    Hopefully tomorrow will go a little better.

  4. Can’t agree with you more, Tim. I got stuck into the local user’s group management because of precisely this. Too much wind on all the “craptastic” stuff (I love that term!) and no one talking about the real issues we all have to put up with every day.

    It takes 30 seconds of OEM and resource manager “wizard” to make a 9i database utterly and completely go bonkers with 600 errors! For Pete’s sake: the darn thing has been out for how many years now and NO ONE has fixed the bug???? Unbreakable, eh?

    (Yeah, it’s “fixed in 10gr2”: WTH cares? I’m running 9i NOW, I want it fixed THERE!)

    You can’t even setup a MV environment for read-only snapshot replication between two databases without having to go into Metalink: one of the required dblinks is not documented anywhere else and OEM and repcat_admin STILL don’t know about it.

    Let’s not even go into how hard and confusing it is to setup aio for file systems with 9i and RHAS3. And this is their “preferred” OS platform!!!

    It’s beyond ridiculous. And yet, all the feedback that is going to Oracle via UGs is the same old same old PC “slap in the back” crappola. No wonder they’re spending their time with the ridiculous “fusion”: they’re not getting half the story from the field!

    I wanna see the “fusion” do a J2EE container startup with 26000 tables in EJBs: that will be fun, given that the most I’ve ever seen at any time was 300 tables and that was on a Godzilla-box! Hasn’t anyone in Oracle yet woken up to the fact J2EE is the WRONG technology for fusion?

    Cripes, talk about shooting themselves on the foot…

    It’s gotten so bad I’m seriously thinking of recommending to management they look at alternatives when they do the next round of “future gazing”!

  5. I wonder if J2EE actually works with Oracle AS without any performance or maintainance issues… Isn’t HTMLDB a better and stable option.

    The way they are marketing OracleAS they should do the same with HTMLDB. Most people have never heard of HTMLDB.

  6. Theory:
    HTML DB is not as scalable because you are doing both the procedural and data work on the database. The idea of J2EE is that the procedural work is taken on by the App Server, leaving the DB to do the data stuff. Also, J2EE has fantastic scaling, you can cluster onto many boxes.

    AskTom is written in HTML DB, and just the plain PL/SQL Web Toolkit before that. I doubt many companies get the hitrates Tom does. With that in mind, can you really question the scalability of HTML DB?

    Also, J2EE sucks!



  7. By the way, I’m not sure I can claim craptastic for myself. A comedian called Harry Enfield used to do a sketch called “Smashy and Nicey” with Paul Whitehouse (from the Fast Show) about two aging radio DJs. Paul Whitehouse’s character used to put “tastic” onto the end of loads of words, hence craptastic.

    I remember Bart Simpson saying Craptacular, which is also very special 🙂



  8. “Also, J2EE has fantastic scaling, you can cluster onto many boxes.”

    Small clarification: the J2EE boffins CLAIM that it has fantastic scaling. Meanwhile, anyone who needs such with anything slightly more complex than a shopping cart is NOT using J2EE!

    I wonder why…

  9. Woohoo – great stuff …

    Isn’t OCS some serious shite … we couldn’t even get it running … got an Oracle consultant on-site – he gave up on it after 4 days installing, reinstalling, patching, installing …

  10. oracle employees call it internally the Collaps Suite. Eat your own dogfood, you know.

    I guess the last one who criticized j2ee within oracle is already long gone.

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