Safe…

Imagine what you would get if you attempted to shoot a film using a cameraman balanced on one leg, standing on a spin dryer, balancing on a wobble board, with electrodes up his ass, intermittently sending electric shocks where the sun don’t shine… The result would be the camera work employed by the makers of Safe.

I usually like Jason Statham in action films, but it’s hard to comment on his performance here because of the absolutely atrocious camera work. I’ve come to expect violent shaking of the camera during action scenes, because it seems the vast majority of Hollywood directors think attempting to give you epilepsy is the only way to make a film look exciting. It isn’t just the action scenes here though. It’s all over the bloody place. One minute you are staring at people’s feet as they walk down the stairs. There next minute there is just a blur on screen with the odd punch or kick (probably). Was anyone really proud of the camera work on this film? Did they go home thinking, “We did a good job today!”?

The story was OK. If this had been done by someone with a better eye I think I would have enjoyed it. It’s hard to judge what the fight scenes were like because I really couldn’t see much through the blur.

My recommendation would be to sit in front of any action film staring Jason Statham, make yourself go cross-eyed and shake your head as quick as possible, then tell all your friends you’ve seen Safe.

Cheers

Tim…

PS. Remember, if you go cross-eyed and the wind changes you’ll stay like that.

PPS. It’s probably not a good idea to actually go cross-eyed and shake your head violently while watching a film. You may feel sick, or get brain damage, or both…

Captain Support : The Newest Avenger?

I have a feeling Captain Support may be the latest addition to the Avengers lineup. Why?

One of Captain Support’s friends was having some problems trying to sign up to a bonsai mailing list because emails from the list were being rejected before they got to him. He used the special signal and Captain Support jumped into action. A little Googling revealed the Plusnet mail servers can be fussy about emails with too many people in the “To:”, “CC:” and “BCC:” lists. They apparently also get a bit cranky if emails contain lots of hyperlinks. Problem solved, so the bonsai world can sleep safe at night, surrounded by potted trees I guess…

I know what you are thinking. “Bonsai mailing list? Never!” It seems obvious to Captain Support this was just a clever ploy by those S.H.I.E.L.D. types to test his super powers before inviting him to join the team. Captain Support will be waiting by the phone for the call from Nick Fury…

Cheers

Captain Support…

ClamAV on Fedora and Enterprise Linux…

Following on from my post on AntiVirus Software and Apple Macs, I decided to add antivirus to my desktop machines also. I chose ClamAV because it is part of the Fedora repository. I wrote a quick note about installing ClamAV on Fedora and Enterprise Linux (RHEL, Oracle Linux, CentOS etc.).

Not surprisingly, scans revealed no viruses on any of my Fedora machines.

Cheers

Tim…

AntiVirus Software and Apple Macs…

After a number of recent press stories, especially this one, I finally decided to install antivirus software on my MacBook Pro. I went for the Mac version of Sophos, which is free for home use.

My MacBook Pro is a couple of years old, has traveled the world and been on countless networks during that time. With that in mind, a virus scan revealed a grant total of zero viruses. I doubt I would be able to say that for a Windows laptop with no AV used in similar circumstances.

Although Macs are still a small percentage of the total PC market, I guess the rise in iDevices and the lack of people running AV software on Macs makes them an attractive target. Time will tell if they become the attack vectors everyone is predicting.

Cheers

Tim…

Repairman Jack : Crisscross

Crisscross is the eighth book in the Repairman Jack series by F. Paul Wilson.

I’m trying desperately not to sing “Kris Kross will make you jump, jump“. Failed.

Two quick fix-it jobs get very complicated. First Jack tries to help a Nun who is being blackmailed. Then a concerned mother asks him to find her missing son who has joined a cult. You would have though by now Jack would realize there is nothing like a simple fix-it.

I think I am being desensitized to the darkness of these books. I don’t think that is a good thing, but it does mean I can enjoy them without feeling the need to ring the doctor to get some Prozac. 🙂

Cheers

Tim…

Oracle on Fedora 17 beta.

I have been playing around with Fedora 17 beta in preparation for my server upgrades when it is released at the end of the month. While I was at it, I did my typical articles for Fedora.

I’ll run through them again when the final release drops, then officially put them live.

Cheers

Tim…